Missing Clara Peller

 

It was in January of 1984 when an 80ish lady of Russian descent captured everyone’s attention by putting her hands on her hips and, with a scornful look, asked “Where’s the beef?”

I often think of her when reading fiction, or the news (these days, it’s often difficult to tell which is which). This month, we’re looking at lies (our own) and unreliable narrators (maybe ours, probably those of other writers)

Let’s start with lies. I often used them to try to avoid chores when I was a kid. I really didn’t like cleaning and grading eggs in our cellar, nor was I thrilled about weeding the garden. These days, I do some of my best thinking while weeding, but it took a long time to get there. Those successive lies bit me big time when I was around eleven. My abdomen hurt like the dickens and I told my father I was too ill to grade/clean my requisite three pails of eggs. He didn’t believe me, so I gutted it out, no pun intended, and finished my chores. At three in the morning, I began screaming in agony and by nine that morning, I had my very inflamed appendix removed.

Perhaps the lie I used more than any other, well past the point where anyone believed it was either, “No I haven’t had anything to drink,” or “I’ve only had one.” It’s been 45 years since I walked into my first AA meeting and I haven’t had to use either lie since.

As for unreliable narrators, I went through the list of my major protagonists and the closest to such a critter has to be Kallista Wolfblood. She appeared in my first fantasy novel The Wizard of Simonton Pond as a sidekick, but in Like A Thief In The Night, she was the main player and had to do some serious self-examination in order to accomplish what she needed to do.

I have another couple who dance along the edge, but mostly because of not knowing their own history for varied reasons. One of those stories is finished, the other whispers to me from the external hard drive where one copy of my work resides. If/when my energy level returns, I shall complete that one. Stay tuned.