Wednesday, March 8, 2017

It Isn't Walking Away, It's Learning to Fly--By Kimberly Sabatini

This month our prompt was to post a picture and blog about what it means to us. 

This was HARD!

I take a ton of photographs. And I'm getting old-ish. 
So, there was a lot to choose from.

As I found myself looking through massive amounts of pictures, I discovered they sparked a million things I wanted to say. 

But I had to pick one.

Then I noticed a trend in my picture taking.

It involved numerous snapshots of my children. Their backs were to me and in most of those pictures, my boys were walking away.

This caused me to stop and wonder why I took so many pictures of them from behind. 
And why I gravitate to the visual.
Clearly, these were some of my favorite photos.

Perhaps, it's because, one day, not so far into the future, my boys will grow up and head out on their own adventures, doing things they are passionate about. 
Things that are independent of me. 

And I love that.

It gives me a tremendous amount of satisfaction to know I'm raising kids who feel confident enough (most of the time) to forge ahead, without looking back over their shoulders.

It's not that I want them to walk away and forget me. 
It's my job to be influential. 
And my desire to be important in their lives.

 But deep in my soul, I believe their freedom will not interfere with the relationships we are constantly cultivating with each other. 

Am I scared they could get hurt, or make stupid mistakes if I'm not vigilant in my protection?
That fear is real--very real.
But, it's a demon I can't allow to take control.

The truth is, we have as good of a chance of destroying a life, by holding on too tightly, as we do of never having embraced it at all.


When I was their age, all I ever wanted to do was fly. 
And it had nothing to do with wanting to walk away from anyone.
It had everything to do with discovering who I wanted to be and what I wanted to become. 

It was never about choosing one aspect of my life over another.

I was simply attempting to become complete.

When I see my boys moving forward, it's that knowledge that makes me want to snap their pictures and capture the moments when they spread their wings. 

Independence isn't walking away, it's learning to fly...

We can't control what happens in their lives, but we can control our ability to remember what it feels like to be on the verge--to be a young adult.


  1. Great post, neat photo. I'm willing to bet ten or more years from now, these young men will still be a big part of your life no matter where they are. My daughters are in their mid thirties and we connect almost daily one way or another. My younger one teaches in the Bronx and calls to share success and to vent every week.

    1. Thank you--and I believe that. But it's always so nice to see other people having healthy relationships with their kids. <3

  2. Omigosh...I take a lot of these pictures too. In my mind, my boys are looking into their future, ready, yes, ready to fly. <3 Thanks for sharing. xoxo

  3. Beautiful picture of your boys/young men and your words are so full of love and wisdom. I too like taking pictures from behind and on roads or paths, especially wooded ones. To me it is a symbol of the journey we are all on. May your boys journey be filled with much love, joy and happiness. I know one thing they will always have a Mom loving them and cheering them on and believing in them no matter what and that is the most precious gift one can give another.

  4. I love this. So much wisdom here!

  5. There's also something so natural about a photo from the back. People usually aren't posing or self-conscious.

  6. Beautiful photo and words! It is a bittersweet bump in time when your kids first spread their wings but watching them fly is so rewarding.

  7. That's how I've tried to parent too :)

    1. It isn't "easy"--it's hard to fight fear, but I think it's more rewarding in the end.

  8. I imagine so many of us have similar photos. I, too, love them. Trying to capture where they are, coming from, and going to... it's produces an elusive but comforting feeling.

  9. Oh, man, I love that line about holding on too tightly being just as dangerous as never having embraced at all.